The Best Jokes From Anthony Jeselnik'due south Netflix Special Fire in the Maternity Ward

Anthony Jeselnik. Photograph: Netflix

It's fair to say that a lot has inverse in the earth — and in the world of comedy — since the release of Anthony Jeselnik's previous special, Thoughts and Prayers , in 2015. In brazen defiance of "that's off-limits" and "it's also soon" naysayers, Jeselnik has consistently used his cocky, sardonic stage persona to address troubling themes. So one had to wonder if and how his mode would change after a few relatively quiet years of artistic output.

His brand-new Netflix special, Burn down in the Maternity Ward, which dropped this calendar week, showcases how Jeselnik has in fact inverse his style … physically. He's abased the make clean-cut Patrick Bateman artful for a more than rugged midwestern-drifter look: full beard with a solid week of scraggly neck growth, leather jacket, "worn" jeans, biker boots. He still seems entirely capable of murder ("Sometimes I wonder if I could impale someone. Practise I accept it in me to take a human being life? And and then I remember, 'Oh, yeah, Debbie'"), it's just that now he looks similar he might have a reason for it, a backstory far beyond white-privilege-bred sociopathy. Every bit for the cloth, it's as calculated and biting equally ever, a testament to the fourth dimension he put in on the road with his "Funny Games" bout. He'due south comfortable in the uncomfortable, taking his sweet fourth dimension and letting the audition slowly lower themselves into the nightmarish bath he's running for them.

Jeselnik's gift resides in his ability to hone a grapheme who'south equally despicable and captivating, and then that he never has to say, "I'm but joking." The freedom to inhabit such a globe without apology allows him to gut the underbelly of any subject he chooses to broach. Fire in the Maternity Ward treads in vi chief territories: family, kids, animals, racism, murder-suicide, and abortion. Each of these chunks includes a good for you dose of 4th-wall-breaking that serves equally a non-patronizing style of releasing a little tension, with a bonus flash-and-nod to those in the know. Examples include:

"I don't know if you guys know what a false premise is, but I have this cat …"

"I'm non trying that joke out, I'm showing off."

"Picket me sell this."

While humbly acknowledging that mere transcription can't come up close to doing them justice (but watch the dang thing), we hereby present viii of the best jokes from Fire in the Motherhood Ward.

My sister had a baby to try to "save the relationship." But I still don't talk to her.

There are a lot of bits in this special that accept a more long-course, narrative approach, but Jeselnik tin merely as devastatingly paint an impactful portrait of sibling relationships with only a few words.

I'chiliad not even the biggest asshole in my family. I had this cousin. Everybody hated this cousin. My own family hated this cousin. And then a couple of years agone, my cousin fell off of a horse and broke his neck. We all refer to that equally "The Superman Incident" because that horse is a hero.

Jeselnik'due south family unit tree has thick branches. Thick, ruthless, nasty branches.

When I was in high school, my loftier schoolhouse employed a blind janitor. One hundred per centum totally bullheaded. All the other kids would joke effectually that he went blind from masturbating too much. At the time I believed that. I was just a child. I didn't know any amend. Information technology wasn't until I got older, wiser, that I realized that's simply an old wives' tale they used to use to try to explain why he was ever masturbating.

We've all heard the stories: "Stop making that face or it will get stuck that way." "If you lot continue touching yourself, you'll go blind." Simply eventually, myths bust themselves.

Ane of my next-door neighbors is a 90-year-old man suffering from Alzheimer's. Every single forenoon at 9 a.m. he knocks on my door and he asks me if I take seen his wife. Which means that every single morning at 9 a.yard. I have to explain to a 90-year-sometime man suffering from Alzheimer'south that his wife has been dead for quite some time. At present, I've thought about moving. I've thought about not answering my door in the morn. But to be honest, it's worth it but to see the smile on his face.

Jeselnik is ever talking about what pisses him off, but every once in a while, a simple human interaction shines a ray of light on his dark heart.

My grandfather died a couple years ago, just he died like a king. No i was even mad. My grandfather died in what has to exist the best style possible. My grandfather died in a hammock, on a beach, in Hawaii, during a dusk. That's how I want to get out: strangled to decease.

A lot of folks say that if they had the option they'd like to die in their slumber. Just why non dream large?

When I was a little kid, I had a pet turtle. Tiny little turtle. Kept him in an aquarium. Ane summer I went away to camp. While I was gone at camp the turtle died. When I got home, my dad lied to me. He said, "Anthony, your turtle is alive and well. It just went to go alive with your mother." I believed that until a couple days after. I was digging effectually in the backyard … and found my mom's body. Worst 24-hour interval of my life. I loved that turtle.

What's the best mode to teach a kid most decease? Probably not this way.

You hear your friend Jeff just committed suicide. Your only thought is devastation: "Oh my God, what could I accept washed to save my friend Jeff?"

You hear your friend Jeff killed his wife and and then himself and you just recall, "Yikes, Jeff doesn't fuck around, huh?"

Jeselnik has put a lot of thought into which type of suicide is the best. For about eight straight minutes he leads the audience through a mini TED Talk in an attempt put murder-suicide at the top of anybody'southward list. Afterward discrediting various suicides ("Doctor-assisted suicide? Get that weak shit out of here! Teen suicide? No. College is important!"), he begins his pitch on why murder-suicide is number ane.

I don't know if you lot've ever helped someone go an ballgame. It's a big favor. Information technology'south a large favor to do for somebody. Not an easy favor at all. Don't get me incorrect, I'm as pro-option as they come. Merely withal, the whole time I'm driving her, I'm but thinking to myself, "Goddamn, there has got to be a improve fashion to come up with new cloth."

Fire in the Motherhood Ward closes with an abortion joke. Correction: It closes with multiple abortion jokes wrapped tightly inside i giant abortion joke. While some may say abortion jokes are tasteless, low-hanging fruit, Jeselnik wants yous to know it ain't easy, as he discovered when driving a friend to the abortion clinic.

The Best Jokes from Anthony Jeselnik's New Netflix Special